GET HUBBIED

Austin and Dave have been together for 8 years. They have broken up and gotten back together approximately as many times as years, but their relationship is strong and gets stronger each time and they are in conversation with us to be our chosen couple. They are also partners in their art practice under the name Fallen Fruit, and are getting the recognition they deserve for the social and community work they do under that name. LACMA is featuring their versatile and generous fruit-centric projects for a whole year, kicking off in 2010. We are excited to consider them and enjoy thinking of what they'd bring to the table.

A Good Marriage, French, by Eric Rohmer - an impetuous but emotionally frail Sabine stars: a woman on a single-minded mission to find a husband. Ditching her married lover, she sets her sights on Edmond, the attractive cousin of her best friend. Edmond is cordial to Sabine but unresponsive to her romantic overtures. Her persistence is wrenching, but... - 1981

1. Clem Snide, "Forever, Now and Then"
   
2. Old 97's, "Question"
3. Josh Rouse, "Nothing Gives Me Pleasure"
4. Death Cab for Cutie, "Passenger Seat"
5. Jimmy Scott, "When Did You Leave Heaven?"
6. The Lemonheads, "Into Your Arms"
7. Ron Sexsmith, "Moonlight Becomes You"
8. Nick Drake, "From the Morning"
9. Norah Jones, "Come Away with Me"
10. Sade, "By Your Side"
11. Matthew Sweet, "I've Been Waiting"
12. Radney Foster & Abra Moore, "I'm In"
13. Neil Young, "Harvest Moon"
14. Chet Baker, "Embraceable You"
15. Iron & Wine, "Ab's Song"
16. Low, "The Plan"
17. Johnny Cash & June Carter Cash, "As Long As the Grass Shall Grow"
18. Clem Snide, "Find Love"

My Dad has made whisperings that he may ask mom to move back down to Savannah. Wow. I have to say that this time it surprises me. Its been many moons since the last split. This would make it their fifth union.

Renowned feminist writer Vita Sackville-West and her husband Harold Nicolson shared an open marriage, indulging in same-sex encounters and other taboo practices in an era of strict societal mores. Set in World War I Europe, this Masterpiece Theater drama explores Vita's tumultuous affair with novelist Violet Keppel in a brave true-story portrayal of lesbianism in the early 20th century. - 1990

We started putting these ads up on telephone poles around the city in art-centric locales. Many site hits.

This remarkable Israeli movie about arranged marriages starts as a romantic comedy: unmarried at 31, Zaza is an embarrassment to his family. Though they parade him past young, attractive, and eligible girls, he resists them all--because Zaza already has a secret love affair with Judith, a divorcée. Zaza knows his parents would never accept Judith; but when his parents find out, the results are worse than either of them ever expected, leading to a harrowing and sad conclusion. Every turn of the story is full of lively, unexpected details; there's not a predictable moment in the entire movie. Dover Koshashvili - 2003

I was thrilled to be asked to Malibu to interview these two testaments to the long lasting possibilities of togetherness - they, together 14 years now, married one, are in love and open enough to talk about the bumps in the road. They are house sitting, a journalist and jewelry designer, reveling in an oasis on the edge of the ocean, but both have an individual strength that outshines their impermanent beautiful environment. They got married in Africa, in the midst of another deeply rooted culture, without their families and with large smiles with a backdrop of human origin and current tribal bliss. I can't wait to edit this footage.

The Ad in ARTFORUM is out on the stands! I got a supportive note from Knight Landesman (Publisher) - he really likes the project and wanted to make sure I understood the placement in the back was because it is an advertisement, so in that section, I got the best placement. I have such fond memories of working there.

Whoa, the details. This is harkening back to CoTour 08 where every detail had 100 details to it. Both Tif and I are on the computer too much for our own good these days, but its rewarding as all the artists bios and images, the research, the marriage poll, and all the aspects of the website we're building are solidifying the whole picture-ness of this project. One more month to get it all sorted, as well as organizing a three-day show at The Company (gallery in Chinatown), a collaboration between me and Abel Baker Gutierrez which takes place on the 2nd, 3rd and 4th of October.

~b

Its a little nerve wracking to have put this brave undertaking into the hands of the universe, but it feels good too. The Ad has been sent to Artforum and will hit the stands on October 1st, thereabouts. The mystery couple will hopefully connect with the deeply good intentions of this project and have faith that HubbyCo, and all our collaborators will see to it that this wedding experience is meaningful and dynamic beyond imagining. Knight Landesman at Artforum, where I worked as the receptionist and then circulation director so many years ago, has given us a glorious discount on the ad, and has faith in our project. The artists are sending in good information and ideas, and its gradual but strong and sure info and image gathering is a sight for sore eyes.

Bettina

Tif and I interviewed this wonderful couple. Their home itself was a testament to the strength of their relationship. They were incredibly forthcoming about the challenges and victories of being a lesbian couple, and they got married during that brief window in California when it was appropriately legal. Their cats were running and playing around in their garden paradise as we talked.

All the artist's have committed to the project, and the advertisement has been scrutinized word by word, and will be sent to Artforum tomorrow morning. Its nice to have that behind us. I'm sure Mike Slack will sleep better knowing I can't change or argue semantics any longer. Now its time to buckle into the month of making everything ready for that Ad coming out. Every word of the websites HubbyCo and GetHubbied will go under the microscope. And the PR of GetHubbied will begin.

Brothers, in a relationship more deeply involved than any romance they've ever had. This is why they wanted to be interviewed together.

Orson Welles' audacious biography of newspaper baron Charles Foster Kane, which, in essence, was a thinly veiled portrait of publishing magnate William Randolph Hearst. Welles's complex and technically stunning film chronicles Kane's rise from poverty to become one of America's most influential men -- and it's considered one of the best movies ever made. Notable to this topic is the famous 'breakfast' montage scene succinctly illustrating the disintegration of Kane's marriage in a brief time. 1941

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Life is Sweet - Mike Leigh, 1991. The plot is simple enough. A couple of days in the life of a working class London family. A couple of fairly deep issues are dealt with, such as eating disorders and depression, but other than a few moments, all we are doing is watching a family live their life: a strong hard-working mother; a weaker easily-led by his mates father; and their twin daughters: Natalie - resourceful and kind-hearted but with a strange tendency to wear men's shirts and down pints - and Nicola - screwed up, rude, irrational and painfully insecure in both her looks and her intelligence. Notable to this topic is the resounding sweetness between husband and wife, at the end of the day - there is love there.

Tif and I went to Jon's house to interview him about his project about couples. He had taken portraits of couples in his circle of LA acquaintances and friends. He was struck by the uncanny pairings that had shared people in common over time within this group. He is such a well-spoken person, succinct in his thinking. There won't be much editing needed here. A romantic at heart.

Sad film with a slightly satisfactory end via the main characters softening from a crotchety professor feared by his students and cuckolded by his young wife - 1940 Mike Figgis

Tif and I went over to a very nervous pair of men, camera shy, but they had no need to be.

A german man, in love with his wife.

Javier Tapia and Signe Skovmand met in Barcelona on vacation and fell in love. They are not married, and feel strongly that the institution is not for them. They have been together for more than 8 years and travel separately for their individual careers, him for art and her for social work. I was curious to see a relationship work with so much separation and no verbal or legal commitment.

Tif and I met with Linda and Alan who are very accomplished architects who are known to use recycled and green methods of building. We went to discuss the build out of the desert property I purchased a year ago - a plot of dirt with a small structure on it. I say small structure instead of house since its basically walls and a roof, no plumbing or any interior goodies. We envision it to be HubbyCo Far East, and a component of Get Hubbied. It would be a retreat for recently joined couples to go and get away from each other, to be alone and to think about marriage, togetherness and themselves as individuals. I went to Montessori school as a child and thought of guiding the individuals through films and reading materials and activities in a solitary peaceful environment.

We then went out to the desert to visit a property that they built, called the It House.

Interviewing Michele and Ivan was a positive reinforcement as to the possibility of mating for life, underscoring their deep commitment and shared system of values, as well as a life-loving attitude.

This film is considered one of Ingmar Bergman's best, an intense drama follows the marriage of Marianne and Johan as it deteriorates - the frustration and misunderstandings palpable. When Marianne learns of Johan's infatuation with another woman, the relationship unravels, yet through it all, a deep, underlying love keeps the couple connected. And Marianne's discovery of her power as an independent woman woos him back to a deeper union. 1973

Here are the questions we are asking most couples when they get interviewed:

How did you meet?

How old are each of you?

Did you have significant relationships before you met each other?

What were each of your parents relationships like?

How long had you been living together?

Tell us about the circumstances leading up to your marriage? Who popped the question?

Why did you decide to get married as opposed to a civil union?

What are your thoughts on gay marriage?

What aspects of marriage are most important for you, and do you subscribe to religious or cultural conventions?

Was your marriage in some way something you did for your family?

Does it increase your feeling of stability to be bonded to each other in this way?

Does it change the way that you feel about each other to be married?

Do you see yourselves growing old together, or do you look at marriage as being a long term commitment, but not necessarily till death do you part?

When you look around at other people you know who are married, what percentage of them do you think are happy with their partners?

Do you think taking occasional breaks from each other may prolong marriages?

The project is coming together and now feels like a real undertaking instead of just a conversation. Its been a complex road, but things are falling into place. The technology has been a big roadblock. I suppose it makes sense that when you up your game, and the learning curve has grown for you, then things can get uncomfortable. Tif and I have been struggling with Final Cut Pro and all its glitches and quirks, but the first few wedding videos have been shot, and the footage awaits our virtual red pen...and then we'll begin logging them to the website.

Stay tuned.

xHubbyCo